Do you ever go out somewhere special and notice a whole bunch of glassware and flatware (knives, forks and spoons) in front of you and you don't know what to do with it all? The list of tips below should help you get by.
1.) So you have sat down at your seat...
The first thing you will notice when you sit down to a properly set table is a series of forks on the left hand side of your plate, and a series of knives and spoons to the right. The order of using this flatware is from the outside in. The cutlery furthest from the plate will always be the first course. If you are doing a degustation these will be replaced for you once every few courses.
The glassware is usually two glasses, but may go up to four. Wider mouthed glasses are generally for red wine, with smaller mouthed glasses for white wine. You might also get a champagne flute and a small glass for dessert wine. Your water glass should be to your right.
The napkin is generally placed over your lap by the server. Never tuck the napkin into your shirt like a bib, this is seen as the height of vulgarity. You should only use the napkin for dabbing your mouth with discreetly.
2.) When eating amongst company...
Always take small portions of food at a time and put your cutlery down between each mouthful. When you put your cutlery down, place it on the plate (never back on the table and do not rest it half on and half off the plate). If you are not finished eating and you want the server to know, cross the tips of the two pieces (if there are two) or angle it if there is just one. When you are finished, place your knife and fork together in the centre of the plate vertically. The tines of the fork should point up and the blade of the knife should point to the centre towards the fork.
You should always hold both your knife and fork. Don't cut your food up at the start then eat it. This is an American practice which is accepted, however not in Europe, so since most Fine Dining in Australia is European based, go with the latter mentioned. The tines of your fork should always point down toward the plate – for difficult foods like peas, you should use your knife to squash them onto the tip of the fork. The fork is not a scoop, stop using it like one! If you happen to drop anything, don't pick it up, the server will do it for you. The exception to this is the napkin.
Wine and spirits should compliment your meal and be quietly sipped on and occasionally throughout the night. Avoid getting completely drunk to the point of doing something you might regret. If your server is refilling your glass, you should never place your hand over or near the glass to indicate when you have enough. You should simply tell the server that you have sufficient or tell them prior to pouring that you do not want to have any more. Never hold the glass for the server to pour your wine.
If you want to toast someone at your table for an occasion to celebrate a Birthday for instance, never tap the side of your glassware with cutlery. Again, this another height of rudeness and you could potentially damage expensive glassware! It is acceptable to just clear your throat.
Unless you know everyone at the table very well, avoid topics around Religion, Politics and Sex. The first two in particular are what divide the world and being out at dinner should be a relaxed, enjoyable experience - not a debate. Give equal time to people to your left and right so everyone can join in on the conversation. It can be hard to talk with strangers however it is important you do this. Break the ice by asking questions about the person you may not know as everyone loves to talk about themselves. Don't yell from one end of the table to the other.
3.) Some things you should avoid doing.
- Don't take photos at the table, it looks desperate!
- Don't treat any waiter or server badly, it makes you look common.
- Don't blow on food to cool it down, wait for it to cool by itself.
- Don't point with cutlery.
- Don't hold utensils while drinking.
If you enjoyed your experience, do thank the person that invited you and thank also the Restaurant owner!
